What you pay for

One of my clients was a holistic healer, she was commited to help other people lead a better quality life, just as myself. Halfway into our session it was clear that she was talented… and still struggling with the business. I have shared some suggestions how to reach the focus group she was really passionate about, but her real problem was her mindset. She was insecure about the value of her work and this routed in her insecurity about her value as a person, leading to low financial standards.

You need to be looking out for this. Talent and dedication is not enough. The underground passageways and subway stations are full of talented musicians, pouring out their soul for buttons. You might be entertained by them, but would you hire any of them to teach you how to play an instrument or sing properly? I doubt it, regardless the price. Talent and commitment must be acompanied with high, non-egoistic sense of self worth, especially for a coach or healer.

Still, she was very happy with the advice she received and we said our goodbye. It is true that to maximise the benefits of a coach you need to have regular sessions, but even one time occasions can give you something you can use to take action and move forward with your life. It’s not a one-size-fits-all type of service. Ideally it is tailored to your specific needs.

She was not the only healer (or coach) I have met who is struggling with this problem and it made me contemplate on the question: what are we, coaches and healers, being paid for exactly? Her idea was that we are being paid by the hour for our skills. I believe there is a lot more to it, what you, our client, cannot possibly see.

Our fee naturally includes the consultation room and taxes that are out of our control, but what else? My first thoughts were, we are being paid for the years we are saving you. It’s not very common that you can actually buy years of your own life. Due to our knowledge that was forged into wisdom through personal experience we can help you achieve a level of personal development that would take you years (or even decades) on your own or talking with your friends. But this is only the “skill” part of the equation. There is something else, something deeper.

We literally stop our entire life, for you. In that one hour, nothing exists. Not our own life, our family, our friends, our hobbies, our phone, our interests, our daily activites, our other clients, our own personal challenges and desires, nothing. Our entire life ceases to exist. For you. Nothing exists, but you and the challenge you are facing. In addition, to help you deal with that challenge we may relive our own past pain, hurt, misery and suffering to fully understand where you are at so we can give you the very best we are capable of. This is what you pay for.

Look into a mirror and ask yourself: what would you require in return to completely forget your own life all together (including family, friends, dogs, cats, you name it), relive your own pain and suffering and only exist to serve another person you may have not even met before. How much would you ask to do this for about an hour? Would you do it for buttons, like the musician in the subway? I hope not…